Sexy Dreams

I'm not going to complain because I am blessed and complaining would be ridiculous. But let me just state the facts. I haven't had 8 hours of sleep in any of the last 12 consecutive nights. When I first started this whole sleep deprived thing I thought I would catch up on weekends, but when you work 60 hours a week and go to the gym every morning at 6am Monday to Friday, you kind of wake up excited at the crack of dawn on weekends and try to figure out how to fit your life into that precious 48-hour timeframe.

And just to complicate matters, I have such intense dreams that they constantly wake me up. I'm usually scared and running from someone. Sometimes I'm crying. The rest of the time I'm getting sex. Earlier this week I woke up from a dream where I was sitting naked on my couch next to my friend Matt, though we were just chilling, watching TV or something. This didn't seem strange in my dream. He noticed my gorgeous balls and started rubbing them, and while I was confused by the turn of events, I didn't stop him. I just let him rub my gorgeous balls. And then I woke up.

Another common sex theme in my dreams is that a man (or two) has broken into my house or somewhere else and I am being held captive by them. In my dreams they often take their clothes off for some reason or another. Sometimes they intend to violate me, sometimes its just hot/humid, usually there is no explanation. I always start lusting after them, and I try to have sex with them. More specifically, I try to give them head. Interestingly, I am not doing this in an attempt to be let go by this mad man. I just ache to have him want my sex. Sometimes I succeed. This was how I had my last wet dream in January. Just to confuse matters, my best friend (a girl) was in bed with me. I woke up as I came, literally groaning as I opened my eyes, and then immediately started laughing at the absurdity of the whole thing.

While I'm on the subject of dreams... My workout partner Matt said he had a dream last night where he was at a table with a really masculine girl. Across this long table was the perfect boy, and he was very frustrated that he was with the girl because she was preventing him from talking to the boy. So for context, know that Matt is always talking about the perfect guys at our gym. So what if I'm the really masculine girl that is stopping him from getting the perfect boy? Wouldn't that be funny? I asked if he thought I was her, and he laughed and said, "Maybe you are."